Hitchhiker Gifts

"Vegas"

'You've got a dog? Great, hop in! I've got rice!'

Cowboy hitchhiker holds sign which reads; Out of town by sun up.

Others using steroids: Hitchikers enlarge thumbs, talkshow hosts enlarge chins, Liquidators enlarged wallets.

"No, you're in the Milky Way galaxy."

Wine enthusiast tries to make his way to Cork.

'The secret to life, my friend, is hoppiness!'

"I love the things I say when I’m in nature."

'Hello there, how y'doin'?'

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

"Well, it might not work but at least it smells bad."

"When are you gonna roll in something?"

"Don't you want to hear about the day I had?"

"It's the adorable snowman!"

'Calm down...it's probably just another mirage.'

Anywhere but here

"Daisy, that fall broke my leg pretty badly. You need to go get help, girl - oh, what a big stretch! Who’s a good stretcher? Daisy’s a good stretcher! What a good girl…"

“Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!?”

"Just lemme finish my coffee."

'I've decided to put off college, and hitchhike around the cat.'

"Wait, I've got sand in my shoe."

"Hungry? I'm ravenous, Norman, I could murder a lentil cutlet."

"You've got a friend in me."

"You've traveled all this way just to score some pot? Okay—How much do you want?"

Bear Signpost.

"Stop whimpering. Most dogs would kill for a walk like this."

Large bird chases bird watcher up a hill.

"I see you've come a long way, Perkins."

"I told you it was a universal truth."

Bear Recycling.

'Too proud to wear glasses, Bob gets what's coming to him.'

"Nature can be cruel, but occasionally there are instances of great compassion."

"Things will get bad... then there will be an election... then things will get worse."

"Write your acceptance speech before winning the award."

Wild, Wacky, Wild and Wacky