History Enthusiast Siblings Pillows

'These new ideas are silly, Father, the boiled tobacco tasted awful and you've spent an age trying to light that potato.'

'Are we there yet?'

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

Ten Commandments

Nobody Upstages Trump!

Mortally Wounded at the Battle of Quebec, General James Wolfe Forgets His Last Words

'No, I will not entertain a motion to suspend the rules!'

Conspiracy Theory Bookstore: JFK, Princess Di, and Osama Bin Laden.

'Must you have chips with everything Sir Francis.'

Where the framers of the Constitution bought their frames.

Quick, follow that star

'Where does this go?'

Warhol Exhibit

Michelangelo's David is cleaned every two months.

"Daniel, I seem to have dropped my keys, could you look around and toss them up."

Mahmoud Abbas

'Fortunately our generation won't have to pay the huge debt. Our grandchildren will.'

"Surely, as the world's only superpower, we're entitled to a little mischief now and then."

"This area has a long and rich history. First, the Indians lived here, then it was a plantation with slaves, then poor people lived here, and now it's a magnificent condo complex."

"Did any townspeople think 'The British Are Coming' was fake news?"

"One day son, all this will be going with me."

Snakes Return To Ireland

Creationists now agree with the scientific theory that the ginosaurs were probably wiped out by the impact of a large asteroid.

"Archaeologists discovered several enormous ancient cities buried under the jungles of Cambodia." "That means the Khmer civilization was the largest empire on earth from the 9th to the 12th centuries." "That changes everything about our conception of the Middle Ages." "What was your conception of the Middle Ages?" "Well... It was... Well, knights, maidens, dragons... Mostly dragons. And elves."

"I never read Mein Kampf. My dad read it to me. I liked when he did the voices."

Trump Memorial

Isaac Newton...stumped.

Caesar slips on ice. Bystander says 'He was warned-beware the ice of March'

'Don't tell me what Aristotle says. He still believes men have more teeth than women.'

Little known fact #244: Cholera was not the #1 cause of death for children on the Oregon Trail

"It's my first novel."