History Discoverer Gifts

School kid discovering history books covered in cobwebs

At the Museum

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

Servicemen.

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

Knight Golfing

'Where was the TSA?'

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

Moses' Tablet

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

CIA report

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

'I'm sure he was a great guy, but there's a new Pharaoh in town.'

"I find that hugely offensive!"

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

"It is we."

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

Adam and Eve on a Talk Show

No time for sirtaki now, Greece!

Harry S. Truman

The Lessons of VietnamThe Lessons of Iran and ContraThe Lessons of Iraq.

New Resident of Downing Street

"I couldn't care less if being Homo Sapiens is the latest trend. While you're living in our cave, you better act like a true Neanderthal."

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

Do you ever wish you lived in a different era, Randy? It's safer to keep me where I am. Injecting my advanced virility into more primitive eras could have disastrous effects on the timeline. Well

Un ballo in maschera

Caption Contest TK

"Believe me it's only an apple."

Nobody Upstages Trump!

'Of all the technological advances from the last 60 years, this is one's favourite.'

Frankenstein's Ancestry

The Quotable Ben Franklin. To lengthen thy life, lessen thy meals. And not flying thy kite during thunderstorms might help, too!

Sadie, I just heard something disturbing, and I think you're the only one who can tell me whether it's true. Youtube is telling me we've lived 300 years of phantom time. Pope Gregory XIII's math was off when he created our calendar, and this is actually the year 1717. What's more, the "Middle Ages" is just a fiction the pope created to explain his rounding error. You were there, Sadie ... Did King Arthur really exist? I'll tell you all about that nice boy, as soon as I demonstrate how we dealt w