Histories_entertainer Pillows

Moses at the urinal

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

Showbiz Awards

Zombie standup

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"Here's another one written in E minor and in case you haven't guessed by now, it's the only chord I know."

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

Clown on bike.

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

A Guide to Balloon Animals

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"Extreme miming"

The Rooster Comedian.

"We're following Carrot Top."

Comedy Cafe

"That'll be five bucks."

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

Cow Show Tunes

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

"Yeah, I got into trouble, but I think the principal really enjoyed my rendition of 'I Did It My Way.'"

'They all laughed when I told them that I was going to marry a magician.'

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

'I'm just not as ambidextrous as I used to be.'

"Bravo!"

"To save time, I'll just mention the people I’m not thanking."

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

"I was going to play the Moonlight Sonata, but I forgot the key."

'What? You ate the gateau instead of throwing it into my face?? You insensitive, egotistical brute! You don't love me anymore!'