Entertaining Enthusiast Pillows

"Hurry with those dishes George, I need them for my next dinner party."

"Two questions: What time are the guests arriving, and do you still want me to slice the pepperoni?"

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

"Just be yourself."

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Police Feline Unit

"His first out-of-body experience."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

Benedict Cumberbatch

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

Thought for today: "All the world's a stage." - Shakespeare. And boy, are there a lot of drama critics.

"I've done this procedure so often I could do it in my sleep. But that's only happened twice – that I'll admit to."

'Is there another doctor in the house? He wants a second opinion.'

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Selling lemon latt�

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

Dog Walking Services

"Aristophanes explains comedy"