Entertainment Industry Enthusiast Pillows

'...Then at 2:30. Senator, you're meeting with a group of woman who want legislation requiring the girls in music videos to be the same age as the rock stars.'

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

Showbiz Awards

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

Job Vacancy: Human cannonball. Applicants must of the right calibre

Big screen TV.

"Spoiler alert! I'm about to tell you the part that really bugged me about 'Wolverine.'" "You don't have to say 'spoiler alert,' minion. It's been a month." "Anyone who hasn't seen it yet has not fulfilled their role as a dutiful consumer, and deserves whatever spoilage they will receive." "In fact, let me know who they are and I'll enter them into my database. When the corporatist revolution comes, there will be consequences." "Um... never mind."

'Would you like you steak WITH or WITHOUT a capella?'

Hairy men taking advantage of the laser tag/laser hair removal combo package.

"Maybe you set it up wrong."

Showing off the good china 3-7 pm.

"Forget the harps, we can spend Eternity in there."

"We can stop entertaining ourselves now, Ian."

"I love being your agent, Nick, but the guys making the really big bucks now are the managers. Let me be your manager."

"We need to sue, claiming free speech is being violated by remotes with fast forward buttons."

'Looks like everyone has FINALLY gone home.'

Music Hall Dancers

"Is it 'Measure once, cut twice?' Or 'Cut once, then measure?' Or maybe it's..."

'I'm not a magician, but I do keep live doves in my pants.'

Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.

"You're wasting your time, I'll never understand which one is Liam Hemsworth and which one is Chris Hemsworth."

'Just remember, he's bigger, but you're funnier. As soon as he starts laughing, you've got him!'

'Another balloon animal? And who do you think ends up taking care of these?'

Medieval headlines.

Frank's bar & grill & jukebox & pool table & chairs & bathroom & mechanical bull & tables & karaoke machine & drinking fountain & lamps & fire extinguisher & doors & floors...

"If you get married at the Grammy Awards, can your marriage be annulled at the Country Music Awards?"

'It's nice, but I wish we could get more than one channel.'