Historical Satire Fan Gifts

Mortally Wounded at the Battle of Quebec, General James Wolfe Forgets His Last Words

'Hey! Who got barbecue sauce all over the declaration?'

'We can appeal.'

Sincerely Machiavelli.

"The chicken is for this year's taxes. The egg is my estimated for next year."

'Lucky we got Clam to circle the wagons.'

'Oh no! We've been Bruegelled!'

The Mummy's Curse.

'Syllogisms won't do you any good here, Mr Aristotle.'

Owner: 'Why didn't you ride as I told you? Didn't I tell you to force the pace early and come away at the corner?' Jockey: 'Yes m'Lord, but I couldn't very well leave the horse behind.'

I imagine the official version will be somewhat different.

The thriving city of Eden as it appeared in fact

Early attempts at standardising currency.

Pirates go blind.

Historians don't like to talk about the French poodle and Indian War of 1751.

'While today's economic problems may be similar to the great depression, don't worry, we have Prozac now!'

'I'll bet you 'Laughing Joker' is playing another elaborate prank on us!'

'Raping and pillaging, Seniors' Tour, 898AD.'

Titanic

'Really?? Are you sure you didn't say St. Valentine's Day masquerade?'

"Ooops is a bit of an understatement, don't you think Cardigan?"

"Good evening and welcome. This evening's debate promises to be a lively discussion of the issues facing these challenging times."

"We believe this woman to be a witch as she is known to have expressed an opinion online."

Two Wise Men & One Wise Guy

Romulus and Remus ( and their brother Derek )

"Wonder what they handed out on the very first Halloween?"

'Off with their heads.'

Ivan the Terrible

The British Hamlet ('Alas poor Yorick, I knew him ...I say 'knew', more of an acquaintance really ...')

The New Dictator

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Jesus has a Practice Before Raising Lazarus.

"We'll be paying for the prairie, the forests, and the streams with this credit card, which is just as good as—if not better than—trinkets."

Man for the guillotine has brought a teddy with him for courage.

Le hoops.