Historical Medicine Buff Gifts

Leeches, lucky charms, rat catching. The secretary of health is in.

"What's that mark on your arm, Mama?"

"The bottle says that 'Extreme Hair Growth' is a rare side effect of this medication."

"We're doing everything we can to make him comfortable, short of dressing up as male doctors."

Cures for Ye Plague

'Feed a cold, starve the plague.'

Edward Jenner

'These young doctors know nothing, I used to see 500 patients every day...'

"Trepanning for gold"

'Why are you giving me an allergy shot. Shouldn't you be giving me an anti-allergy shot?'

Early Blood Draw

John Snow

"I had no idea that exercising my right of immunity meant this."

Covid Vaccines

"Milton finally found a doctor he can trust - one who still believes in the healing power of money."

Water: the first medicine

An early medical case ripe for a malpractice lawsuit.

"So why is it that we only get to see you whenever you need a gruesome amputation?"

'In this practice we like to have the best of the old with the best of the new.'

Antique Ailments

"We use leeches on the test subjects and slugs on the control group."

Consultation of Physicians.

'No, no, the pills don't have any medication to improve your balance. You'll just get steadier on your feet by trying to catch pills that are thrown to you.'

"We'll be performing the operation using original instruments."

Early Anaesthesia

Florence Nightingale

"It's just a reaction to all that artificial flavoring and artificial sweetening. Now if you just take this synthetic medicine..."

"They just don't make 'em like Doc Malone anymore!"

"On certain types of wounds we use lawyers instead of leeches because lawyers never seem to get their fill of blood..."

Lady Physicians

Historic Medical Moments: The first time a body rejected a heart before it was transplanted.

Hippocrates

"I'd thought I'd lost my arm when I was hit in battle. It's amazing what they can do with reconstructive surgery these days."

Rene Laennec

'I need to depox.'