Historical Jokes Mugs

'Sure, but I'm the one who has to SKIN it!'

"Hic. Gosh and begorrah!" "Wha?"

The Trojan Beagle.

"Don't tell me we're eating Paleo again."

'I made your favorite for dinner — pterodactyl nuggets!'

Richard the Turd

"Why T-Rexes do not play volleyball..."

'We're getting closer - That's a goldfish.'

Gladstone Gives Disraeli a Bloody Nose over Schleswig-Holstein

'I can not tell a lie concerning the cherry tree: mistakes were made. However, I must consult with my spin doctors before saying more.'

"I call it decking - it will be all the rage in a few years."

Mistress Talking to Maid

'I did give your brother a job - he's keeping an eye out for forest fires.'

'This one is for not making a pre-emptive strike against anyone questioning our authority to make pre-emptive strikes.'

Jurassic Ark

"Oh that's just great! You remembered how to make fire. I'm so impressed!"

Vlad the Impaler - The Later Years.

The old colonel wished he was in the land of cotton.

'It wasn't like this when I left it!'

"I don't know about you, but ever since we invented language, I've been getting a lot less sex."

'Oh darn........I forgot The Alamo!'

"Your early stuff was funnier."

"Good idea. Bad execution."

'To be honest, I'm having trouble keeping up with all this new technology.'

'I went to my girlfriend's cave for dinner, and everything was going fine until I stepped on her father's tail.'

Early origins of 'lowbrow'.

Computer announces to user: 'You now have more files than Al Capone had under his pillow in Alcatraz.'

Prehistoric Cigarette Lighter

'Uncle Oog isn't very smart, but he's a lot of fun to play horsie with.'

'You paid three goats for this? Robertus Parkerus only rated it LXXIV.'

'It was his last request. 'Once around the park'.'

'You and your 'Hey, don't worry, the King is going to love this April Fool's joke'...'