History Humor Mugs

'We've just learned how to talk and the first thing they say is 'No'.'

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

'Yes, all at once!'

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

"Don't tell me we're eating Paleo again."

The discovery of asparagus.

"Right here's fine."

"It was a lot more satisfying before 'catch and release.'"

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

Ruddy bloggers!

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

The Fall of Gnome

A child at a museum starts to pull the wrappings off a mummy.

'We need to have a shake-up!'

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

'I made your favorite for dinner — pterodactyl nuggets!'

Cat scratches on a pirate's wooden leg.

"The fourth horseman says that he will be late. He hasn't left the Old Testament yet."

Are you the guy who ate my brother?

Bible Bloopers

"How the hell is that supposed to feed us?"

'Finish your homework first, Og... then you can watch the wall.'

"Get off the stage and get a copy of 'Studies of Laughter in Interaction'—I think you'll enjoy it."

Mortally Wounded at the Battle of Quebec, General James Wolfe Forgets His Last Words

"Yes, but this one is made of Chiclets."

"Don't talk to me before discover coffee."

"...it's another metal detector."