Historical Communicator Gifts

'Careful. Smoke signals may possible cause cancer.'

"My squaw's no idea how much these messages cost, she thinks firewood grows on trees."

"Agamemnon and Clytemnestra have decided to separate amicably."

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

Horse statue throws off rider.

'This is a letter opener, from the days before faxes and email. I just sold it online after I listed it as a vintage communication device.'

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

Rocket Ark

"But if I don't learn handwriting, how will I be able to read Grandma's letters?"

"I'm not great at communication, but my little buddy is."

'With government cyber snooping, we must communicate through channels no one would ever suspect...the postal service.'

'That line means good managerial skills!'

'That's funny - the computer said we had mail..'

The early version of accidentally hitting 'reply all.'

"If I ever start using emojis have me moved to an assisted-living facility."

Body Language - Hiss!

"Click heels... needed ASAP... in Kansas."

Why the dodo became extinct

"That's not an email, so you don't have to worry about it containing a virus. It's a birthday card from Nana."

'Well, yes, the fine print is in Arabic, but it's a wonderful language.'

'Please... take... a... moment... to... complete... our... brief... survey... to... help... improve... customer... satisfaction... '

"Roughly translated, it says: this wall is now available on video and DVD."

'The bad news is that we've had to cut most of the services...'

Samuel Morse dictates a letter to his secretary.

'I hear a still, small voice crying in the wilderness.'

'How come no one ever sends me a fax?'

International Sign Language For...

John's Early Attempts at Direct Messaging Proved Futile.

'The 'Lord's Prophet,' eh? - I don't remember voting for you!'