Hipster Fashion Gifts

"No this is timeless classic menswear appreciation. Hipster beatnik is Tuesday nights."

"I should warn you that I've stopped thinking of my moustache as ironic."

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

Wifi in Hell

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

Emergency Hipster Beard

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

What's In Her Bag? Coachella Edition!

Joined at the hipster.

"Face it, Clive - you're bald."

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

"Yuppies! There goes the hood!"

Spontaneous Kombucha

"I always end up buying way more black-truffle honey than I intended."

Your Guide to Winning Movember

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

"He's deliciously vintage."

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

Normal Beard vs. Hipster Beard

Meticulously prepared, locally sourced food served on artifacts of a romanticized industrial past, by people who take their fashion cues from daguerreotypes, to adults whose parents still pay their rent.

Peak Beard/High Peak Beard

The Organic

"You'll find that as a restaurateur I've worked hard to showcase the finest in organic and free range ingredients that have been harvested and prepared in authentic and traditional ways."

"Thousands of craft beers and I still haven't found one with a smooth, kibble finish."

"We’re trying to inject a little pastoralism into our lives."

"Wow, yours is already climbing your beard!"

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."

"Give me something that shows I'm hip AND fiscally responsible."

"I'm your hip replacement."

Can I get you another coffee?

Homing Beatnik

"Golly, bongos and espresso! You folks haven't changed a bit."