High School Performer Gifts

Come on! They're posting the spring musical. I can't wait! I want a romantic part! With and elegant gown. Good luck with that! We're doing "Cats."

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

'How are the ventriloquist lessons going?'

'Mom, Dad! Look what I created in lab today!'

Exam

Applause. Clap clap bravo. Spring musical. Cats. You were terrific! Our little girl!

Four children playing the flute.

"Check it out! In nature, females are in charge...they select their mates!"

PROBLEM AREAS

"Do you think that will count as our 'Fifteen minutes of fame'?"

Drummer

Baseball batting cage theater La Cage Aux Folles.

"I got an 'A' for my anti-gravity science project!"

"I started a collection!"

"I got an 'A' - and all my research was from infomercials."

In addition to brilliant grades and perfect SATs � Parents' night. College admissions. Your child should excel at 3 sports and lead a school extra-curricular like the newspaper. Don't the arts count? Sure! If your child sings, for example � A part on 'Glee' or in the Metropolitan Opera would certainly help. Our kids are doomed.

'The dog ate my homework -- I thought maybe you could X-ray him.'

'Yeah, I don't have trouble remembering my times tables, but I stink at algebra...'

Ginger Baker.

'Between the school assignments, sports classes, and dance lessons, I hardly have any time to spend with my dolls.'

Child stands on Math help books to reach blackboard.

'I have a math test tomorrow, Sir, and I could use a godsend multiplicationwise.'

"I got an A in not being annoying!"

"I got the highest grade in the class, except the giraffe."

"I attempted to circumvent the traditional trappings of a teen furlough...but I was thwarted by my czar-ish parental unit."

I'm trying out for the spring play. You'll be great! Ha! You'll be grateful to be an usher, Meryl Creep. Yeah. The good parts go to real actors. Sigh. The arts are sooo uplifting.

Don't make me look! How do you like my prom dress? Don't make me look! Chill, dad, it's Nana's old dress. It isn't revealing, Honey. It's no the old dress. It's my old little girl I can't look at!

'Straight A's. That means good.'

'I'm at that awkward age when I can't read my own handwriting. Do they teach penmanship in college?'

'Right now my plate's full juggling school and parents.'

Hey, Twig! Ryan Beardsley wants your cell phone number! The divine wonder of West Fester High? Finally! My life changes for the better. He needs activities for his college apps and wants to come to our shortest eco-club cleanup. Change you can believe in. West Fester High School.

"Today I found out a teacher can call on you even if you have location services turned off."

"It helps to read a grade level ahead!"

'And now, for your musical entertainment!'

"Hi Ginny, that's a nice new haircut you've got there. Are you trying to be cuter than me?"