Hieroglyphic Historian Gifts

'It's a prescription from my doctor, but I can't understand his terrible handwriting.'

"Darn autocorrect!"

Pyramid Handicap Parking

"Writer's block?"

"Is it (eye symbol) before (water symbol) or (water symbol) before (eye symbol)?"

We speak hieroglyphics here.

"This is amazing! Roughly translated, it says 'King Tut was here o.k.'"

'This stuff is a snap for me. I used to be a pharmacist.'

"I can never remember, does 'barge' have one snake-head jackal, or two?"

'Mena,the presses are about to roll.' 'But I'm STILL writing my column!!'

"Nice job, but there in the middle, I think you spelled Akhenaten wrong."

"I can write, but I can't draw."

"I'm sorry. . . but I can't understand a symbol you're saying."

Egyptians discussing hieroglyphic spelling.

"I crawl that I may savor the richness and diversity of people and places along the way."

"The pharaoh wanted the carvings on that wall."

Hieroglyphic disco dancer

"What's a two-dimensional picture for 'rhymes with blinks?'"

"It's eagle before snake except after feather."

Lost to antiquity.

'Don't be ridiculous, Schaumberg! -- They didn't have Burma-Shave back then!'

The Nosy Cleaner

"I can't take another memoir."

It appears to be some sort of joke. Fwd: Fwd: Fwd.

"Oh yes, apparently this one is a copyright symbol."

'It's this one here, that I don't understand.'

Dr. Harper had a special eye exam chart made for hieroglyphics professor patient.

'Amazing what a little teamwork can accomplish.'

'I can't believe this. . . 'There was a young man from Nantucket...'

This guy's spelling was terrible --- Everybody knows it's "eye" before "eagle."

Communication: Then and Now

"I'm going to refer you to an ankhologist."

"You don't look a day over 3030."

"So what's the emoji for 'low-hanging fruit?'"

'Remember my son, it's not who you are, but who I was that matters.'