Herb Whisperer Gifts

Last Will and Testament: Salt, Pepper, Tarragon, Garlic.

Here i've planted some basil...here I have some Rosemary...and here is my Beanstalk...and here are some chive...Oh Geez!! Dang Giant.'

The Busy Gardener

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

Plant Lady

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

An Unexpected Guest.

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

'I had a wonderful garden last year. Bark beetles, aphids, mealy worms, thripes, wax seal, gray mold, and grubs!'

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

"Usually gardeners only have green thumbs, so you must really spend a lot of time in the garden."

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

Garden Goddess.

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

Award Winning Gardener

Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants.

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

"Ed's tree hugging was out of control."

Botany Baby!

"Is this Randy the Love Doctor?"

"I'm losing my patience with you."

"Would it kill you to give me a hug?"

'Betty liked the way her house provided lots of private space.'

An old man growing berries

"Security? There's a goddam tree in my office."

Woman in hospital has i.v. attached to plant.

'This plant which you brought to me from your office snubs all my other plants.'