Hen Motivator T-Shirts

"I believe in eggs, and I think that you all believe in eggs, too!"

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."

GCSEs

'I made my own list of My World's 100 Most Powerful Women!'

"Yo, Ned Beatty, paddle harder if you ever want to kiss me again."

'Ahhhh?I love the smell of a staff meeting in the morning!'

"I thought your show-and-tell was really brave."

'Would you like a push Dear?'

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

"I want you to learn from my mistakes."

Mentoring Unit: 'Go on! You can do it! You can be a mentor!'

'Yeah, the carrot helps, but coffee is what gets me going in the morning...'

'And one, and two, and three, and don't get discouraged Manatee, and four, and five...'

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

'You think irritable fowl syndrome is bad? Just wait until you hit menopause.'

"Sure, Pop, I see the ball—what I don't see are incentives."

The 6 A.M. News Team

"Nihilistic rage motivates me to cling desperately to this job."

Guidance Counselor's boxes, 'push'--'shove'.

Fat Britain

"It's Friday and the boss put 3 sugars in his coffee! It's going to be a good day."

"You make me want to be a better bag."

"You should have been here at eight o'clock."

'Lose weight or you're through as a western star!'

'Get up or I'll send in gramma.'

"I'd like to lose 35%of me!"

"Are you talking to amoeba?"

"This is your wake up call! It's 6:15 AM. The temperature is 57°. Have a pleasant day."

Chicken Affirmations

Perks of self-employment.

"Wow, all the way from the couch. Have the endorphins kicked in?"

'It's not an actual motorcycle. It's an exercise bike. I made it look like one so my husband would actually use it.'

Bob devises the ultimate weight-loss system.

To Do List: Wake Up/Smell the Coffee/Drink the Coffee/Now What?

'Mr. Hartley, the motivational speaker is here to talk to your plants.'