Heart Bypass Pillows

I heart bypass t-shirt.

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

Light Bulb Moment

'I don't believe it. Five minutes after he gets the darn thing, he has an arrest!'

Introducing...Anagraman.

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

"The good news is that your cardiac surgery was a complete success. The bad news is that we had to remove the song from your heart."

'My boyfriend's a Cardiologist.'

'Scientists say that crosswords activate brain...'

Mensa Does Improv

'Henry had a successful animal organ transplant - isn't that right, Henry?'

An abacus swimming pool

"Caption contest"

"Oh my God, help! Is there a logician on board?!"

'Now that's what I call rejection.'

'During the heart-transplant, since it was your birthday, I went ahead and added two more inches, no charge.'

"The medic said he died of an ST-segment-elevated myocardial infarction -- Jack was always a showoff."

'Don't worry about your heart - it will last you till the end of your days. . .!'

"My cardiologist taught me the value of heart work."

'Non-alcohol beer, unsalted potato chips and tofu hot dogs? Why did you accept a party invitation from a cardiologist?'

"While you were under, I had all your friends come in and sign your heart stent."

'What do you mean, you've had a change of heart?'

Fetch the Boomerang

Cardiologist/Truckdiologist: Medical help for Trucks.

Garden Sudoku

Answers to last week's brain-teasers

'I wish there were true and false questions on math tests. At least that way I'd have a 70% chance of getting one right.'

Hopkin's for Clinic the Dyslexic

'Well, I'll be...look at this...there's a song in his heart!'

"Oh no! You, again?"

'My thanks go first to the Nobel Committee for this great honor, and to my son who encouraged me to keep my mind agile with word games, and puzzles.'

"My ex wife is a heart surgeon. . . she ripped my heart out!"

Safe driver.