Healthy Snack Seeker Pillows

'Mom can I have another apple?'

"You gotta at least dip it in ranch or something."

Tartine

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

Rage.

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

Honest Vending

Super Heroes.

Love is when you watch television together.

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

How The Sausage Is Eaten

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

Medical Marijuana Dispensary / Medical Cheez Doodles Dispensary

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

Back in 5 minutes!

Sheltering in place.

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"

"Goal!"

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

'You do realise that's pot pourii?'

"He's an indoor cat."

"My parents won't allow sugar in the house, so I've had to learn about it on the street."

How lazy people decide what to eat

A new career for George W. Bush: taster in a pretzel factory.