Healthy Shopping Gifts

Supermarket Aisles: 'Good for the Environment' and 'Couldn't give a flying F@$#! about the environment!'

"Good For You / Bad For You"

Nature versus commerce.

But is it organic?

How can he sleep so comfortably knowing that pillow will someday be clogging a land fill...

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

See you at the farmers market!

All Natural Nothing

"They've got me doing cosmetics research."

Price may vary with weather.

"I love finding my food at the Farmers Market. Makes me feel like a true pioneer."

I'd like a mocha almond vanilla latte...hold the coffee.

Diets: Sweets and Biscuits.

Modern Witch Shoppe

Man in radiation suit with 'Fresh Farm Produce'.

ONE MORNING WHILE GETTING DRESSED,

'Could you tell me where the organic locally-grown vine-ripened union-picked kiwis are?'

"Do you carry any shampoos that have been tested on little kittens?"

'Yes, the wood on this pencil is from a renewable source.'

Pets: This animal has not been tested on products.

"Your chocolate biscuits and cakes are getting smaller - and where's your sweets aisle?"

It all began with free-range chicken. Then it was organic vegetables. Next the farmers decided they should all take a year off to go find themselves.

Shop assistant hands over 'eco' shopping bag, saying: 'Would you like a bag for that?'

"Oh get over it. It's crocodile. We're alligators."

'Do you sell eggs? . . . I forgot to say that I have middle class guilt. . .'

"It's the closest I get to being a hunter-gatherer."

Tips for a green Christmas by Indian Wild Animals.

How can I ensure I'm getting 100 orange juice? Buy an orange!

"Nothing that's overfished, poached or farmed? How about some seaweed?"

'We have a new line of eco-friendly shoes. They're designed to reduce your global footprint!'

Second hand store: 'LEFTOVERS AGAIN!'

In the interest of the environment, no plastic bags issued with purchases.

Is online shopping bad for the environment?

"This would be perfect! If it were a different style, in a different color, from a different store."