Healthcare Watchdogs Pillows

50 million without health uninsured.

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

'Call me immediately if there's any serious side effects so I can notify my lawyer.'

'Due to government surveillance, is my allowance taxable?'

"When it comes to medical malpractice, most lawyers only go for the money... ...I go for the doctor's head."

Toxic Waste Lorry/Toxic Additives Lorry

"According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything."

"And once we wipe out the disease, where does that leave us?"

'It's a brand new state-of-the-art waiting room.'

Minister rubbishes private sector hospital initiative.

Stafford Hospital - Twinned with Hell.

"...And since the cure is worse than the disease, we can make more money by developing a cure for that!"

"Today we insure every American and end the need for private health insurance."

'Hi! I'm a freshman -- when do I get corrupted?'

World Health Organization

"You know it's the American drug companies that give you the headache that is cured by the pills they sell you."

"Rumours of a crisis in the NHS are groundless...Spending is up by 2%, management ratios down by 62%..."

Playing doctor: 'This time I get to play the HMO bureaucrat who decides if you live or die.'

"I'm sorry, Mr Percival, but what you've got is not economically treatable."

Nice Apology, Mark

Hospital: Senior Care/Long Term Care/Who Cares

"This is like the time you had me sell water as a 'diet drink'."

FDA will 'Regulate Tobacco'.

"Do a double-blind test. Give the new drug to rich patients and a placebo to the poor. No sense getting their hopes up. They couldn't afford it even if it works."

Cook for 3 minutes stir, wait 30 years to discover if the contaminated ingredient gives you stomach cancer.

If you thought that congress was going to work to drive down prescription drugs costs. . . dream on.

"Why couldn't you open that wide during the procedure?"

The SCOTUS six

Weight Loss Clinic: 100% guaranteed.

"We've got a new customer, Eddy: run a couple of kegs over to the Supreme Court."

When More Government Is A Good Thing

GPs asked to solve rising obesity levels..."I read in the papers that I'm fat and you've got to sort it out!"

"Those bullet holes are something new, aren't they?"

'You don't need to worry about your records being sold to the highest bidder...they'll bugger it and sell them off cheap!'

Robert Menendez investigated for corruption