Healthcare Tech Enthusiast Gifts

'Having all this information on my patient's diagnostics is great, but I think I need a degree in data analytics to sort it all out...'

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

"When I grow up, I want to go into medicine and help people who can pay out of pocket."

'What's wrong with me, Doctor?' 'I have no idea! That information comes within doctor-patient confidentiality.'

"We need to update your entire operating system."

'I asked if you were affiliated with an HMO not a UFO.'

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

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"You only need one prescription. The other 7 are for the side effects."

'Um, can I get a FOURTH opinion?'

"As soon as your dentist gets here, we'll begin."

"So you're interested in medicine, public relations, business, contract negotiations and insurance law? Which one will you study in school?"

Get well soon!

"I hear he's taking an experimental drug called, 'It Ain't Over Till It's Over.'"

Healthy Patients Only

What will the little one be? Epidemiologist? Virologist? PPE manufacturer?

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of insurance forms.

'It's an emergency, Doctor. The vitamin company needs an endorsement.'

"You call all this a side effect?"

"I'm sorry, but the doctor no longer sees patients in person. But he does take e-mail from 9 to 3."

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

'There, we're up and running! Let the logging in begin. . .'

'Thanks for inviting me to dinner - it's really great!'

Drug vending machines at hospital.

Eye, ear, nose, throat & real estate investment trusts.

"I'll bet he takes other dangerous drugs too! See if we can catch him with an aspirin!"

'What's this? You're suing me because the prescribed medication made you 'irrationally exuberant' in a down market?'

'Doc, my stiches are coming out,'

"Just think of this prescription as an app for your body...with side effects."

'I would have been here sooner, if not for a wonderful, caring, competent doctor.'

'Talk about high-tech! You'll be getting a pacemaker ipod combo.'

"I'm sorry, but it's just not going to work out between us. We're contraindicated."

'Looks like a perfectly healthy limb to me.'

'...Do you have an appointment...?'

"Sometimes a tightness in the chest can be a sign of high blood pressure. In your husband's case, however, I just loosened his belt a little."