Healthcare Parody Enthusiast Gifts

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

'Nurse, why is there always a fly in my ointment?'

Kid with plaster cast being sawn off.

"These are my fish cymbalta, otezla, skyrizi, vraylar and stelara!"

'Time for your pills.'

"You need the toilet. . . hang on I think I've got an app for that."

The importance of paying attention in med school.

Dr. Flagg's Worst Nightmare

"We can give you enough medication to alleviate the pain, but not enough to make it fun."

'Snap out of it.'

"I'd like to approve a second opinion but your HMO considers that experimental medicine."

"Norton! Put that back at once!"

9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer.

'This could be a very expensive operation — I'm going to refer you to the Federal Government.'

'I'm afraid there's been a 23% cut in the 'empathy and compassion' budget so you'll have to tell him to sod off now!'

'Have you heard about the new Medicare drug plan called plan C? Medicare gives you $30 for a bus ticket to Canada!'

'I think it's your colon. I came to that conclusion through the process of elimination.'

'The Doctor says you can be discharged - so I've brought you a list of jobs you can do when you get home!'

'Like I said - It's non invasive surgery.'

I don't care what happened on ER. This doctor patient relationship is not going to descend into unbridled passion.

'You need some stress.'

'You do have catastrophic insurance, but it only applies in case of invasion from outer space.'

'I'm sending you to see another doctor, he's a specialist in hyperchondria.'

"... And who asked for your opinion, I'd like to know?!"

Flu Drugs.

Flyingdoctor's receptionist.

"I've heard that your medication can grow extra nipples, but I wouldn't worry about that if I were you..."

Fish swimming around inside drip.

'Virus?' - 'Yes, it's a Latin word we doctors use, meaning I haven't got a clue..'

"Yes, I have seen people in worse health than you. But, they were all dead."

Nurse holding giant pill tells patient, 'Relax. It's chewable.'

"Your bedside health care book ... thanks for not reading it."

He said he loved her for her brain but was her appendix he was always taking out.

Hospital porter leaving brain behind