Health News Aficionado Gifts

"Your health crisis continues to unfold."

Oligarchy

Be Healthy

Our Two Parties, Explained

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

Man Reading Laptop.

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."

Matryoshka/ Russian Gas Cylinders

Fear of news.

'Fitness guru.'

'...Next election voters will have a choice of democrat, republican and 'generic'.'

"Wow. . . is that you, Mr Erdogan. . . Mr Kim Jong-un. . . Mr Putin. . . Mr Maduro. . . Mr. Bin-Salman. . . Mr al-Assad. . ."

'Hey!! What gives, there's nothing but a bunch of squiggly lines on this newspaper.'

'What I have to do first?!'

'Wendy! I'm glad you came over! I want you to see my baby's ultrasound hologram!'

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."

"Hey... friends and allies can trust the USA!"

"Sometimes it helps to turn a question around. Why not you?"

Putin's Mutual Destruction

Office of the Special Investigator: Stepped out to follow the 'money trail'.

'It's a nicotine patch...I've been smoking too much.'

'Another day. . . another half dozen medical breakthroughs for us to comprehend. . .'

"But the good news is Trump has broken off diplomatic relations with them only on Twitter..."

Joe Biden

Hang in There Democracy!

"A newspaper has a responsibility to ensure that its readers are fully informed."

It's 10PM. Do you know who is in control of Pakistan's nukes?

'I suppose that's where things get ironed out.'

"Bad news on Wall Street today, as the bottom fell out of the market, the sides collapsed, and the top blew away."

"My approach is nontraditional, but from a uniquely Western perspective."

"Hey, this anti-depressant you've come up with really works"

Health Nut with a 60-Pack

'In the belief that no news is good news, today's financial report has been cancelled.'

'It has been revealed that a senior politician will criticise something in a speech. Later they will criticise the opposite of something, just in case.'

News on TV: 'At last, some good news from Iraq...Saddam's chamber of torture is being converted into a chamber of commerce.'