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Public Safety Notice: Hold the Handrail/Public Hygiene Notice: Do Not Hold The Handrail

The Jeopardy of Progress

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

Pinocchio's Second Realization

'I got an alleged C on my criminal law test.'

"God works in mysterious ways."

Bad times to sneeze

Grim Reapers sitting their 'Finals'.

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

Man crushing grapes with flippers.

"Marriage and water, I find, don't mix."

'I think I caught one of those fish showing on the graph.'

'I would've done better in geography, but the test on Australia boomeranged.'

'Sorry professor, my mind was some other place.'

'Mum, Dad, I've downgraded my academic forecast.'

'If I had Doppler, it would be predicting a storm when my parents see this grade on my meteorology test.'

"Look, I got a good grade because I worked hard. It's like riding a bike...stay in your seat, keep moving forward and you'll reach your goal. Unless you hit a lipstick case dropped in the middle of the road."

"Those image resolutions are crystal clear, but it's my New Year's resolutions that are getting pretty fuzzy."

'There's only one side effect from this medication. It starts when you don't pay my bill!'

'If my grades don't improve, I don't know what'll happen. Maybe they'll offer me a buyout.'

"There is no complaint department, Robert."

Pick Your Own

"Look, Dad, I can explain my report card... Maybe I'm not the best student in the world...maybe I'll never be as good as you want me to be... Maybe..."

'Didn't some smart guy say, 'Ignorance is bliss?''

"Give the kid a break, Jonathan! Don't you remember what it was like being a 66-year-old?"

A-level results 19th Aug - 'D' for dunce

Coronavirus Flag of the OMS

"Just get over it. That's what I did." Bob turns a tragic loss into a lame attempt at helping others cope.

45% of GPs Ignore Nice Hypertension Guide.

'I'm on a one month diet... So far I've lost 14 days...'

"Is this what the P.M. meant when he said they were united?"

'He's reached his limit with Government health advice.'

Wise Monkeys and Covid 19

"Sure I'd be happy to give you some innovative thinking! What are the guidelines?"

Covid preys those who don't follow the regulations...