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Local Guidelines

The Jeopardy of Progress

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

Pinocchio's Second Realization

'I think we'd be more confident about meeting our targets if we could work out what they were!'

'I got an alleged C on my criminal law test.'

Secretive Weigh In.

"Here at Global Com we're looking for people can 'think outside of the box'..."

"God works in mysterious ways."

'I'm not sure what I want out of life, but I want a lot of it.'

Bad times to sneeze

"I just feel like I'm constantly disappointing parents everytime I appear on report cards."

Grim Reapers sitting their 'Finals'.

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

"Keep it up. His knuckles are getting really sore"

'Today I invested in some Chinese stocks, but I felt greedy again in an hour.'

"On the one hand, we'll burn in hell; on the other, that's a lot of money."

Man crushing grapes with flippers.

"Marriage and water, I find, don't mix."

'Sorry professor, my mind was some other place.'

'I think I caught one of those fish showing on the graph.'

'I would've done better in geography, but the test on Australia boomeranged.'

'Such petulance!'

'Mum, Dad, I've downgraded my academic forecast.'

Cat boxer

"Look, I got a good grade because I worked hard. It's like riding a bike...stay in your seat, keep moving forward and you'll reach your goal. Unless you hit a lipstick case dropped in the middle of the road."

'If I had Doppler, it would be predicting a storm when my parents see this grade on my meteorology test.'

"Those image resolutions are crystal clear, but it's my New Year's resolutions that are getting pretty fuzzy."

'If my grades don't improve, I don't know what'll happen. Maybe they'll offer me a buyout.'

'You're not achieving the bench marks.'

'Part of me wants to get caught. I need to get in touch with that part and beat the hell out of it.'

'Alright, gentlemen, I think we'll dispense with 'cheese'...'

"There is no complaint department, Robert."

'I know I'm just a weather reporter, doc, but I feel guilty every time it rains.'

"Look, Dad, I can explain my report card... Maybe I'm not the best student in the world...maybe I'll never be as good as you want me to be... Maybe..."