Health Care Worker Gifts

"Apparently there's been a mix up...you've been getting 'Butox' injections."

Thank you, Essential Workers

Nursing

'Really, it's quite all right! You see, at this clinic, we believe that only the wounded doctor can heal!'

'I see a lot of that at this time of year...you've got a nasty case of cabin fever!'

'I thought it might help you get your mind off things. It's a story of hope and survival. Nothing at all like your story.'

'Never mind how accurate they are -- How DISCREET are they?'

"So laughter isn't the best medicine..."

"Are you carrying any food, plants or dangerous ideas about a more equitable health care system?"

"Sir, a customer is trying to use their insurance to pay for medicine to save their dying child."

'He tries to stay happy in his work.'

'The $39.95 is for the prescription, sir, and the $7 surcharge is a little something for our handwriting expert.'

In the days before the introduction of seeing-eye dogs...

'Could you turn up the volume a little?'

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

Opportunities in Coronatimes

2021

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

vaccine wars.

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

"Our war is against cancer."

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

'Well, well, well...'

"The prostate biopsy shows your pain threshold is much higher than normal."

"The first one's just a warning."

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'