Health Advice Debunker Pillows

"In health news, everything you thought was good for you is now bad for you."

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

'Cock-a-doodle-doo!' 'Cut back on the chicken soup.'

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

Well, there you go. I guess it isn't "Feed a cold, starve a fever."

'According to Dr Alvin McDowell, everything that was good for you is now bad for you!'

'You are talking about health? Ha! My cig does not have calories, fat, cholesterol, carbohydrates and sugar!'

"Well the good news is that everything was supposed to be bad for you is actually good, but the bad news is that everything that you thought was good for you is actually bad."

"My doctor told me to get outdoors more, so now I put on more yard sales."

"I suggest you take these pills on an empty stomach."

'It appears that 'reduced fat' means high fat, 'lo-fat' means plenty of fat, and 'fat-free' means some fat.'

"I don’t care what you read on social media, I cannot prescribe chocolate mini eggs to help with your weight loss!"

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"Your compulsive talk about crazy diets, get rich schemes, and mail order drugs -- your pacemaker's been hacked and you're spamming."

"Your internet researched analysis of your condition and treatment is impressive,and it would be 100% on target...if you were a goat!"

I'll sleep better if I only drink one cup of coffee a day.

"My doctor said I needed to go on a diet. . . Yes, to a new doctor!"

"Stop watching ladies beach volleyball for a while."

'You're fat. I'm putting you on a diet.'

"Stop reading this stupid paper."

"My mom said I can't come here anymore." "What? Why not, Billy?" "She said she sends me here to get hot chocolate, not to get bad relationship advice." "What 'bad' advice? All my advice is solid gold." "You told me to call the IRS with an anonymous tip about Andrea Wheaton's father avoiding taxes, so next time he tells her I'm a bad influence he'll look like a hypocrite." "That didn't work?"

"Your next fattened kid could be your last."

Obese guy looking a shelf labelled 'Free Fat Food'.

"Where on earth did you read that alcohol is good for you?"

"You're retaining water. Stop eating sponge cake."

'The Surgeon-General today advised everybody to turn the TV off and go take a walk.'

'Dr.Davis was beginning to wish that he'd taken a little more care in wording his advert.'

Entrance Exam for the Mildred School of Medicine

"Fasting means you stop eating. It doesn't mean to eat your food faster."