Harmony Humorist Pillows

'Never get a haircut from a barber shop quartet.'

Cello Saw

"I appreciate you have a real passion for music Mr Hibberd. . . but I can see you're going to struggle with the piano."

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"We only got six days of funding."

"I just love the way you're so endlessly inventive in the bedroom."

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

"According to this article, snoring can result in justifiable homicide."

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

"Surgery up here is free!"

The Adventures of God

'No, I'm the marriage counselor. What you need is the semantics counselor down the hall.'

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

'It's not for myself, you understand."

'Well, thanks, but we have no need of a Divorce Lawyer: We're Lovebirds you see...'

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

"All we have left is standing room only."

A surprise in heaven

'We've re-branded.'

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

"I do tech support for the cloud."

"Suddenly, you’re a fan of New England stone work?"

"See that stain? My wife did that, not me. All her, totally her fault."

'I knew if we waited long enough, heaven would downsize.'

"Some mid-life crisis that turned out to be."

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

"You are running low on cloud storage space. Please upgrade your account to continue."

"The 'Sing Only in the Shower' Community Chorus"