Hard Drive Hero Gifts

The six stages of hard drive death and dying.

"They decided giving out pink slips was too impersonal. So now they're blue."

"Now that's what I call customer service!"

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

'I didn't realize we'd employed a cyber bully in you, Miss Tweedy.'

'I feel like I'm in a rut, too!'

"Oh, go on Jeffrey. . . Give him an order!"

'Where do you keep the elbow grease?'

'Uh oh. I can see another few hundred will be added to your bid.'

The Workaholics Building

"I'm looking for a Father's Day gift. What kind of wrench says 'I love you'?"

TECHNICAL SUPPORT, 'Have you tried pounding it with your fist?'

Music Freak.

'I don't like your attitude, Peterson, whatever it is.'

'Nothing cements the relationship like the chance to get it in writing.'

"This is my son...I want him to work his way up all the way from the bottom- even if it takes all day."

'We're not interested in how you work with people, just computers.'

"What's it like, working with your hands?"

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice performing the duty of a Christian.

"We've been hacked by our enemies! Is there anyone who know something about computers?"

"Here's a video showing how to fix a toilet. It shows a guy calling a plumber."

'So to hit the training targets I have to arrange five days a year training for the staff that we haven't been able to recruit.'

'Dinnertime!', 'Not now, Mom -- the fate of the Galaxy is in my hands!'

'While they always come back as unfounded, maybe you could prevent these allegations of sexual harassment by not telling people you like the cut of their jib.'

"This one is for hacking into our enemy's hacks."

"Frankly, we're just keeping out heads above water."

'Say, Doc, I'll need more of that steroid stuff for old King. He's still kind of peaked. Must need some heavy doses."

One Man Band

"Just because it happened at the office Christmas party doesn't make it a 'work related accident'!"

'Say what you like about Cloud Computing, but the technical support is amazing.'

Has somebody taken the staff development and training budget again?"

Service Call Showdown