Harbour Master T-Shirts

'Antonio said we'd know which was his. Wait! That must be it!'

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

'Will you raise my allowance? I want to play doctor but can't afford the malpractice insurance.'

"He loves his leaf blower."

'Slip Ahoy!'

'Just a couple more and we'll call it a day.'

A meeting on the pier

"We're going to need a bigger rake."

"For the last time, 'port' is left, 'starboard' is right!"

"I asked for a Hexagon and you built me a pentagon - of course you cut corners!"

"Mabel, you are becoming a control freak..."

Line, area and volume

'How about a game of cards?'

Do not take fish by unathourized means.

Rock, paper, scissors

'I should've known better thank to park my car anywhere near where you dock your boat.'

No, you're still saying arrr, not ahhh.

The gods drink beer while Zeus throws a thunderbolt.

'Get your mitts off my leaves!!'

'Face it Cap'n - the whale's given us the slip!'

'Just think, I could be taking you to your bridge game if we had bought that bass boat.'

I don't care if all your friends are going around, you're not going anywhere until your chores are done.

"Lawyers and rats fleeing the ship; that can't be good."

Check your boat: 'Weemollususwhoppingfine.'

'He's an experienced golfer! Experienced in sand traps, water hazards and slicing.'

You're stopping me for sailing & drinking? No sweat. I can swim in a strait line!

'If you really cared about me, you'll swim back to the boat and get my bottle of wine.'

My problems

The Fiddler crab.

Fisherman mending his net.

He left without paying the docking fees? Yep -- That's why we call him "the skipper"!

'You're setting the hook too hard, Hank.'

Give a man a fish and he'll eat of one day; teach a man to fish and he'll stink for the ret of his life.

"Careful Hank, this one still has some fight in him."