Happy Plot Seeker Gifts

Heaven

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

Evil elves trying to take advantage of Christmas tree fairies.

"I'm ready for summer vacation! A good book takes you where you've never been!"

"I don't mind car chases as long as they're car chases about something."

The Bride of Frankenstein

“I’ve got an idea for a story: Gus and Ethel live on Long Island, on the North Shore. He works sixteen hours a day writing fiction. Ethel never goes out, never does anything except fix Gus sandwiches and in the end she becomes a nympho-lesbo-killer-whore. Here’s your sandwich”

Trilby - 'Taffy was allowed to see Gecko'.

'I've got'em right where I want'em.'

10 commandments

"We love your manuscript! It's exactly the sort of big, sprawling epic we've been looking for!"

"Well, I've been struggling to write a book about my struggle to write a book..."

"Sorry, but your personal life story just isn't very original."

"We need a plot twist."

"Sure, it's a little formulaic but I love it!"

He Didn't Know How To Appreciate Nature

Writer Will Work For One Good Plot Idea

"It's a novel about loss, and redemption, and fantastic sex."

"Class, Gracie's great aunt Carmen is here to share some fun Latino folk tales!"

Galoots in cahoots

"No, I don't mind if you peek,' said the mystery writer to the next victim.

Mid-list Author Magazine

Ghost Porn

Man lifts up the pages of a book and discovers a brick wall.

'That holiday I booked for my wife to the Galapagos Islands? She found her way back, so can we try another destination?'

"Please, sir, do you have any spare plot ideas?"

'Well, he gave me treats, patted me, played with me: How was I supposed to know he was a burglar?'

'I like the lust,greed and sex - it's just the integrity that bothers me.'

"And to think we started as a book club."

Conspiracy theorist

Horror

'The scruffy gits Fawkes.'