Happy Learners Gifts

The Book Club

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

"Academic freedom doesn't mean you're free not to study."

Grade 2 Cellist

"I'm still pre-literate."

'I did it all from memory.'

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

Education and Apprenticeships

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

Teacher has two boxes: "Book Smart" and "Street Smart"

"What do you mean, it's not an educational toy? I'd have to learn to ride it!"

"I'm doing all I can to make the little things count."

'There's one app we can't give you ... aptitude.'

'Miss, I think I've learnt all I can too.'

'The trouble with education is everyone knows how to teach, but nobody knows how to learn.'

'After being here for more than forty years - as undergraduate, graduate student instructor, professor - what saddens me most is that this was not the college of my choice.'

University of Hard Knocks

'OK Sheldon - which part of the Unified Field Theory do you not understand?'

'To better prepare you for the future, I've replaced the letters in your alphabet soup with Chinese ones.'

"Thank you for 30 years of teaching service. Now you have 5 minutes to turn in your keys, I.D. card, empty your desk and be escorted out."

Moral Values for Dummies

"Dude, I've never seen you so happy about a 'B' before."

The college of my choice.

"I'm sorry, Dad. What I did was really stupid, selfish and wrong."

'So, just how long were you at the School of Hard Knocks?'

'And that one painted and forgot to close the curtains.'

'Son, before you go, always remember the joy of life is in the journey, not the destination.'

"A school's purpose is to excite, engage and stimulate its students' minds...or so I'm told."

"Almost 30 percent of teachers assign extra reading during Hispanic Heritage Month."

CIVICS 101

Learning.