Happy Hour Hustler Gifts

Buy one beer, get one free. If I may paraphrase a famous quote, "Beer is proof that God has mixed feelings about us and wants us to be hungover."

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"This place has the best happy hour."

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'No standing while room is in motion.'

"I think I speak for my entire generation when I say, 'Yes, I will have another drink.' "

Happy Hour

Clown waits for 'Happy Hour' to begin.

"Think we'll still make happy hour?"

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

Best Before 5th Pint.

"As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from restless dreams, transformed into a monstrous vermin, he thought to himself: never again bourbon and tequila in the same night, and this time, I mean it."

"I love these off-site business meetings."

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

"Not much. Just enjoying my post-lunch bounce."

Ask not for whom happy hour ends. It ends for thee.

"He took eight shots on the 19th hole!"

"How was my day? I'm still calculating the little victories minus the humiliations I normally suffer."

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

"By 'dress down day', most of us mean not wearing a jacket!"

Cell Bar & Grill. Happy Hour All Day. The new owner is an endorphin.

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

"If it's my pride, I'm not here"

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

'The way I see it, drinking is its own reward.'

Prawn Cocktail Please

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

'Okay then, what's the price break on TWENTY drinks?'

Infinity Tavern

'I grew sick of Madison Avenue,so I quit,bought the bar and never looked back.'

'They're not beer stains. This is actually a 'Rorschach test' patterned shirt.'

"I'm off, I only popped in for a swift three units."

Next Round Indicator

"You're going to regret this in the morning."

'What did I SAY to DAVE?' - A person with hangover worrying about the night before.