Happiness Warrior T-Shirts

A bunch of smiley faces protest unhappiness.

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

'Well, well, well...'

Be Healthy

"Your contents have shifted."

"Your bad cholesterol is trying to persuade your good cholesterol to switch sides."

"Another one so relaxed, she couldn't walk out of here."

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

"I'm weighed down with so many gadgets, I'll need a push to start me off."

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

"You left your demons here last week."

Hot Pie Therapy

Kid with 'Little Wellness Facilitator' kit

"I keep telling myself I've got to slow down."

'And finally, there is the universal solution.'

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

FIGHT STRESS: Walk-A-Thon

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

"I have a huge house, millions in the bank, and a twenty year old wife. But am I happy?..."

Happy Days Are Here Again

"I told him he should have trained more."

Shrinks in heaven

"You're in perfect health and look half your age – I'm prescribing something to help you shut up about it."

'I tried being pessimistic. I was terrible at it.'

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

"Would you like me to give it to you straight or sugar-coated?"

'What are you eating now?'

'C'mon, c'mon! I want to be the first one on the stair-climbing machine!'

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

Making healthy substitutions at mealtime