Handyman Projects Gifts

"I'm looking for a Father's Day gift. What kind of wrench says 'I love you'?"

Cordless Drill and Drill Less Cords.

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 2

Man uses a pogo stick to 'Shake well before use'.

Jack of all trades

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

"He's having a hard time finding work."

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

Kid with messed up project in Wood Shop, titled: 'Wouldn't Shop'

"In the whole length and breadth of this world there is no more admirable a spot for a man and his dog to pass the time than the local Home Depot."

Tool Box

Painting the Ceiling

'I found the termites!'

'Can I invite my friends round to watch, Mom?'

A man sees a leak in his ceiling and drills a hole in the floor under leak to by pass his apartment.

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"

'They look more up to date than the ones in your tool-box.'

I did it my way.

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

'You've reached McWit Quality Construction. If your foundation has cracked, press 1, if your plumbing is leaking press 2, if your house is collapsing, press 3 ...'

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

'A cousin to the hammerhead, here we see the allusive, yet, handy, multi-use shark.'

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

'I suppose you want Polly to forget she heard that.'

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

"Flat pack furniture is my passion. It's just a shame I haven't the space to assemble it."

'Now it fits.'

'It all started when he tried to assemble a backyard gym without reading the instructions.'

Fuel bill gone through the roof

"Of course I know how to use a chainsaw!"

"The bad news is that I backed into a fan. The good news is my owner's a plumber."