Handyman Humorist Gifts

Goofy builder.

Tools

Single contractor in search of intelligent, attractive woman. Send picture of your tool chest.

Cat sharpening claws on grindstone

"I did replace it...with another broken light bulb!"

"You mounted the mirror upside down, Harold!"

Drain cleaning

Plumber

Elwood 'I Can Fix This Myself' McGrunzen

DIY Store "I don't know why we come here..."

"Yeah, and it's a poor craftsman that blames his tools."

'Tony's obsession with DIY had started to go to his head'

Woodworm surrenders with a white flag, as man treats floorboards with woodworm killer.

Jack of all trades

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

"He's having a hard time finding work."

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

"In the whole length and breadth of this world there is no more admirable a spot for a man and his dog to pass the time than the local Home Depot."

Tool Box

Painting the Ceiling

'I found the termites!'

'Can I invite my friends round to watch, Mom?'

A man sees a leak in his ceiling and drills a hole in the floor under leak to by pass his apartment.

"I thought you were making a coffee table?"

'They look more up to date than the ones in your tool-box.'

I did it my way.

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

'A cousin to the hammerhead, here we see the allusive, yet, handy, multi-use shark.'

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

'I suppose you want Polly to forget she heard that.'