Handwriting T-Shirts

'I'm at that awkward age when I can't read my own handwriting. Do they teach penmanship in college?'

Ambidextrous Society.

'Yes, this is a very neat report you printed out on your home computer, but this was an excercise in penmanship.'

I love Fountain Pens

"This app encrypts verbal communications. My doctor's handwriting is all we need to encrypt everything else."

"On a pencil, this is called an eraser, not the delete button."

"Yeah, the Declaration of Independence is beautiful! What font is that?"

'Stewart, why is the handwriting on your mom's last two attendance notes different?'

'We keep Amos around just in case the computers break down.'

"I know it's a ransom note, but it's just so refreshing to get a handwritten letter these days."

All your credit references are fine, but our handwriting analyst looked at your application and....

'Did you think that since so few people now use a manual typewriter, I wouldn't notice that you'd typed your penmanship homework?'

"Think I'll take pen and paper and write a letter...just to see if I remember how."

Veterans of Cursive Writing

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

"They say it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something- I guess I was a bit hasty throwing that together in 144."

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

Copycats

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

'How fast can you hype?'

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Squeezing the Free Press.

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"No, I didn't steal your content. I just have your content's doppleganger."

Campaign for Plain English

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'