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It is illegal to fall asleep under a hairdryer in Florida.

"We need to stop sharing one set of clothes."

"Let's try for dignified yet playful, while maintaining the spirit of preservation."

Not you. Your hair.

Ed's receding hairline!

Lawyer to bad hair lady: 'It's difficult to establish pain and suffering based on a bad hair day.'

'Of course I want a short back and sides. I've only got a back and sides.'

'Well, I think it's very creative of the dog to make a wig from his shed hair.'

Wally's dye job...makes his hair look 25 years younger.

Bald Man Overcomb

Easter Island Tours. Theories differ. Ernie believes they were used to display a selection of giant wigs.

"In your 40s, hair starts growing everywhere except where it should."

'He's wearing a toupee.'

Operation Chrome Dome.

"We've been victorious in many battles, and yet helmet hair remains our fiercest foe."

'Wait till the big dumb nut gets home and finds out he's got a wig.'

'Just a trim for me thanks.'

'I have way too much respect and dignity to dye the grey out of my hair... so instead could you all just put on these brown-tinted glasses.'

Toupee in a tin.

''Just face it - you're going bald.'

Bobo's Barber Shop

"Can you suggest something that will enhance my hairstyle?"

"His baldness was way out of control, so we had to put him into a medically induced comb-over."

The Knitwit...

"Huston, we have a bad hairday problem!"

'I use that to check for combovers.'

Nicky Clarke sheep shearer

"The combover works even less now that you're using your back hair."

Amino acid. Shampoo with amino acid, I said, not battery acid.

"I've really got to stop describing my hairstyle as birdsnest!"

"And you thought you were having a bad hair day."

'I have a proceeding hairline. It runs in my family. . .'

'Blummin' 'eck - a granddad!'

"My father would never let me marry a boy with a combover."

'He was superhuman. Then he started to lose his hair.'