Habit Juggler Pillows

'I'm giving up all of my good habits. They're easier to stop doing than bad habits.'

Work/Life Balance

Travelling

Acclaimed mother.

"It boils down to which I dislike more: ironing shirts or non-iron shirts."

"I've given up trying to be on top of things."

"I was able to consolidate all your prescriptions into a single pill."

Education Guidance

"I'm putting myself through med school by waiting tables. I'll be back shortly to take your blood pressure."

"Guilty of a sense of humor in a tight-ass world."

"History test? But I studied all night for a math test!"

Children.

"I've learned to compartmentalize my stress."

"I didn't feel any 'earthquake'."

"If anyone can balance a career with motherhood and state-sponsored terrorism, it's Jeannie."

Tom Mullica.

"Doctor, before we start you've got to promise me that I don't have to give up anything."

Using plant pots to reach inaccessible object

'Your mother and I are worried that all these video games may be having an effect on you.'

'I don't understand why you don't want to take your daily medication.'

"Right, 1:02 minutes to the corporate conference meeting."

Sorry, sir, but today is Tuesday, and I never did get the hang of Tuesdays.

"Bad case of 'Swivel Neck' comes from trying to watch too many games at the same time!"

'Life isn't all about the money.It's all about the little people you step on along the way.'

Man has drug cabinet labelled 'Safe Drugs' and 'Not Sure Drugs'.

"After working through my vacation, my sick days, and my commute, I'm going into work for some well-deserved down time."

Man with balloons about to bump into a woman with a cactus

"Mommy want you to have everything she had when she was growing up."

Well, I can't sit around all day - I have things to do.

Why men hate shopping.

'Don't worry. If you gain a few pounds, I'll drop extra stuff on the floor for you to pick up.'

Career.

When Harvey's two bosses meet head to head! 'MARRIAGE!' 'CAREER!' 'Oh, oh!'

Closing a Suitcase

"I'm off early, hoping to spend a quiet evening with the kids."