Habit Critic Gifts

'Speaking of poison plants!'

'That's it - I'm leaving home!'

'Stop repeating yourself, Brown!'

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

'It must be a problem of interpretation. I've read this book DOZENS of times, and I keep winding up here!'

Giving Things Up For Lent.

"I think I see a miscreant in the carpark. There's no time to call the police I must deal with it myself."

'Look! Man has been here!' 'Yeah, it must have been a man because the seat was left up.'

"I knew there was something wrong when he stopped reading the obituaries."

"No you are not ok! Tell me what's wrong! You've been sitting for two minutes without checking your phone!"

Give me a child at seven and I will show you the MAN!

'You're docile enough alright, but I don't like how you grind your teeth while you sleep!'

Seeing the marriage counselor.

'Now don't forget what I told you - no touching!'

"He downloaded one of those apps that helps you quit smoking."

"A foot bath after a long hard day at work is really nice!"

List of things to do today. Make list of things to do tomorrow.

'I'm worried. I gave up smoking without any trouble.'

"Well, last year I kicked gambling. . . the odds are 3 to 1 the New Year will be a good one."

Shut Yer Yapper and be Happy, Loser! There's a ton of so-called simple self-help books. The five most important questions: 7 habits of highly effective people: 7 steps to living at your fullest potential. Too many steps! She's going to be filthy rich.

'I can't help politicizing everything!'

'Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday you like beans.' 'Now you don't.'

"Don't worry. She usually breaks her fitness resolution within the month."

'I want to speak with you about your work habits.' 'You mean work is habit forming?'

Smoking Cessation Clinic - Formerly The Pub.

'I've decided to narrate my own like in the third person today', he said - 'Oh, God. Not this again', she uttered plaintively. - 'Shut. Up.', she bellowed threatiningly at the fleeing man.

Addiction Research Centre.

'Our dog's been dead two years but he can't break the habit!'

'Must you eat without your shirt on? The crumbs falling into your navel are beginning to compost.'

'Scanning articles without finishing them on the Internet is affecting you. You're not finishing anything.'

"I wouldn't usually say, 'she's always copying me' is grounds for divorce."

'Sister Agatha you're flirting with another bad habit,'

"And do you, Robert, mind if I smoke?"

'I had to report it. Based on your lifestyle, your heart attack was premeditated.'

'Diet patch, stop-smoking patch, birth control patch...'