Gym Skeptics Gifts

"I've finally joined a gym but have decided to ease myself in - so I've booked a twice monthly pedicure."

The Woman Without a Core

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

"I have to get down to 125 pounds before I go back to my real gym."

Cheerleaders

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

'Gathering dust isn't dangerous in itself, but it's a sign of lack of exercise.'

And this model comes with a fitness tracker.

'The only exercise I believe in is the exercise of power.'

'Why are jogging on the spot?'

"Professor Williams had at first been reluctant to join the Assistant Deans in their Think Great Thoughts aerobics. He later came to enjoy the activity."

"Fit watch say me need more steps."

'Yes, yes, yes, now seriously, what can we do to improve our health?'

'Ha! Here's your problem. You haven't been taking the human growth hormones. Someone sold you some other kind of hormone.'

Jeff was watching his weight.

"I didn't miss my workout...I didn't miss it one bit!"

'Can I have a refund if she puts the weight back on.'

"Hey dude, when I said curls might help, that's not what I meant."

"You have to start exercising. Running your mouth, skipping breakfast, and jumping to conclusions doesn't count."

"We daren't go in there at our age. We'd probably end up with slipped discos!"

New Years Resolutions: Join Gym. . .Cancel Gym.

"Exercise?...What you need is more napping!"

Maude's yoga classes were beginning to pay off.

'I call this exercise 'Urban Aerobics'

"Smacked down by reality in 24 seconds."

'Well at least we got him off the sofa.'

''Buy low, sell high' is not considered an aerobic activity.'

"MMPHH. . . I said I don't think I'm built for yoga!"

'if your wife ever asks you to meet her at Pilates...don't! It's not a pizzeria.'