Gym Procrastinator Gifts

'I did a push-up once - It didn't do me any good at ALL!'

'With the handy remote you can adjust your exercise program from the couch.'

Gym. I don't need to exercise --- I have an ab crunch on my smart phone!

"I thought you said I needed to get some 'extra size'."

'Me too. I've lost 25 pounds. Sadly not in weight, just in wasted, unused membership fee!'

Sports centre lift.

"I know I live just around the corner, but it's taken 6 years for me to come here..."

"Go to the gym? When have I got time to go to the gym?"

"Should I buy larger exercise clothes? Or just start exercising?"

"Ugh . . . nevermind."

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"Honey, I can't go to the gym today. I feel too out-of-shape."

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home."

'1001 things to do whilst waiting to get on the internet.'

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

"This next song's from the soundtrack to the film of the book I never got around to writing."

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

"I was all set to go to the gym, but you'd be amazed how much, yoga class and pour-a-glass, sound alike."

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

'I'm not lazy - just resting before I get tired...'

'My arms are getting shorter.'

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

'Busy Dear ?' 'Just watching my exercise video.'

Easy chair exercise machines

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

'Look! A rock hard body in 90 days!'

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

'Hey, boss, what's a 7 letter work starting with 'w' that represents what I should be doing rather than solving crossword puzzles?'

Invaders from Planet Manava.