Guardians Of The Home T-Shirts

'Will you tell the dog I live here!'

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

"He likes it."

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

Garden Gnome fishing all the fish for pond.

Bumble Bee

"Careful. That house has a taser."

Lovers' leap with chaperone observation point.

The Gardener's Holiday: Don't leave produce behind you to perish.

The Bearskin Hat Family

'You must be Jimmy's father . . .'

Steven had a sneaky suspicion that the local birds were beginning to rely upon here.

"Careful."

Biodiversity

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

"Why do small children ask so many questions?" "Why not? We need to learn, don’t we? Anyway it’s no big deal is it? Isn’t that what parents are for? You were probably the same, weren’t you? So why complain?"

"Beware of God"

'It works all the time: Light a candle and dinner comes to you...'

"Relax. They're just crows."

'I prefer the term 'mobile home'.'

"Boy, the kids are growing up so fast!"

'What? I'm scratching the sofa! I'm not! And if I was? It's your fault!'

'At midnight, we go over the wall.'

"Whoever dug up my carrots had better learn to play dead, fast."

"We like to think he's experimenting with color and form, but his art therapist suggested we're not giving him enough candy."

I know it's you that's been digging up my garden. I certainly didn't put those rose bushes in.

"Nice job with the petunias, Skip. They're a perfect complement to the trip wires."

"Why do humming birds hum? Because they don't know the lyrics."

"We've given it a great deal of thought and we decided we're going to give in to everything you want at all times."

'...And it comes with valuable coupons toward your next purchase.'

'Maybe I haven't made myself clear enough. I really don't want to be disturbed today!'

'It's only a slug Norman.'

'Success! I've just hacked into a supposedly squirrel-proof birdfeeder!'