Grooming Humorist Pillows

Akme Hair Removal and Waxing

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

Braiding a Horse's Tail

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

Use the body brush vigorously - he will enjoy it.

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

Lesser known greek gods,

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

Bathing the dog

Monkey Curling Lion's Mane.

"Absolutely not!"

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

Emergency Hipster Beard

Dogs shaving

"Too much concealer?"

"Be creative...!"

Owner Looks Like Poodle.

Dating is so expensive...

A daily rubdown with a beard brush will wrangle awkward bristles and train them downwards...

'Your fur looks like you slept in it.'

'Wrinkles can't breathe in mud.'

What price beauty?

"Face it, Clive - you're bald."

'We've got a special this week on nose hairs!'

'I'm not in shock, my eyebrows are just receding with my hairline.'

General Meade's Army, Near Culpepper - Shaving in Camp

Arms reach through a mirror to straighten a man's bow tie.

'That'll be four thousand and eighty pounds please'

"I'm not saying your after shave smells bad, but.. maybe you should use one mosquitoes don't like so much!"