Grits Gourmet Pillows

'I'm learning to say Y'all and I like Grits.'

"Everything on our menu uses organic, locally sourced, graveyard-to-table ingredients."

Queen of Quinoa

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

'It's supposed to look and smell greasy.'

100k Desert Crawl

"The Bluetooth Special comes with a side order of Wi-Fi."

Cat eating fish from fishbowl.

Vet to angry-looking dog: 'You ate some crabgrass, eh? Were you self-medicating again?'

'VEGETARIAN ZOMBIES' colour

'Oof.'

'It's the same as our regular Angels hair pasta, but with extra grease.'

"I'm using this travel site to map out a trip to the land of Everything's Deep Fat Fried."

"It needs a dash of gravel, I reckon."

Chinese Novel Cookie

'I can't make dinner right now - I'm installing new software.'

'Now where did I put my knitting needles?'

"No, thank you. I'd prefer seeing a menu from the restaurant across the street."

'Honey, I think you have an error message coming in from the kitchen.'

"Cemetery Pie"

Picasso paints AND eats like a child!

'Whatever fast food - fried stuff, fat, sugar, salt for the 'Doesn't Bother Me' person'.

'I'd take that with a pinch of salt if I thought the council could spare any.'

'My broker advises me to have the pork bellies.'

"We're looking for a hacker to break into our competitors computers and get their recipes."

Waiter, there's a wireless earbud phone in my soup.

'Thank goodness the FDA now requires us to number each grape. We were almost caught up around here.'

"Dinner's ready."

In The Olive Garden, we harvest bread sticks year round.

"Judging by the noises your stomach is making, this app can suggest which restaurant to go to, and what and how much to order."

'My New Year's resolution is to eat more fruits and vegetables.'

'Meadow fescue, meadow grass and perennial ryegrass! This is going to be the best party ever!'