Grievance Enthusiast Pillows

"But a deep sense of grievance and indignation IS my Happy Place."

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

"War is hell and so is this soup."

Sign on desk reads: 'Thanks for not wishing me a nice day.'

'I wanted this on the rocks.'

In, Out, Complain.

'A word of advice, the squeaky wheel gets the totally organic, 0 trans-fat, soy-based lubricant.'

Complaints departement for men and women.

'Someday we'll look back on this and think, ‘Why the hell didn't we sue?' '

"Waiter, there's a hair in my soup!"

Complaints clerk to consumer: A hair in your TV dinner? Maybe it belongs to a celebrity!

Continental Breakfast...$2.99: 'What continent is THIS supposed to represent?'

Broken since March

'I wish you would come to me first with your grievances, instead of going directly to the United Nations Committee on Human Rights.'

"Look, I'm not denying the validity of your grievances. I just think they'd be better addressed at home, Helen."

'I thought I'd seen everything, and then my wife came up with tofu fajitas.'

Moanathon.

Grumpy Old Men

Airline concerns.

"We only shop brick and mortar because my husband likes to be disgruntled face-to-face when returning things."

'I hate them too. Listen, would you like to go out sometime? Dinner maybe? We could complain about the service.'

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

"There's a grouch on my couch."

"True, the fly is not in my soup. But it took one taste of my soup and dropped dead."

"Just eat your alphabet soup Harold."

Desktop Print Hell: '...an eternity of different printers and no windows driver...'

"My left buttock is noticeable larger than my right and my dog is missing his hind legs."

'Kids get right up my nose!'

'How long do I have to sit like this? My neck is stiff, my arms ache. I've got pins and needles...'

'To be honest, you're the only one who sometimes bothers to hear my complaints.'

Wine, Whine. Unwind.