Gridiron Investigator Pillows

"O.K., let's see what all the fuss is about."

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

Round up all the king's horses and all the king's men for questioning.

'Still not ready to talk? Ok dip him again.'

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

"We'd better watch Cranston. He looks like a whistleblower."

Lady Justice and Confidential Files

Good luck tonight, xoxo, Coach.

"You're either lying or not telling the truth."

Giant pandas doing surveillance in a zoo.

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

'Here, we started to be investigated...'

Acme-5000 Lie Detector

Totalitarian Humour

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

'It was part way through the initial investigation that detective Walters felt as if he was being watched, but there was no one in the room. No one that is except the cat, who sat contently on the chair and watched him with an almost human repose.'

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

"It's either the Ten Commandments or the Mueller Report."

Football team discussions.

Input From The Front Office

The lion statues in front of New York City Library are replaced with spies.

'Is that a suspicious package in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

"Absolutely, Senator, in my mind it was always my country first, and obscene profits second."

'The Wilsons picked up a quarterback in the off-season. The Riveras picked up a quarterback. The Ludwigs picked up a quaterback...'

Office of the Special Investigator: Stepped out to follow the 'money trail'.

'I believe the murderer is in this very room.'

Mark Gastineau