Greeting Aficionado Pillows

Beyond meet

Hello!

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

"Call me?"

Sitting in a tree

Child's Drawing (With Elephantiasis)

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

"We’ve nailed guitar-solo-face. Time to try playing instruments."

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

"It said this 'Spilt Coffee' series afforded her a lifetime of lattes."

Valentine Day

'Wow, talk about genius!'

'I'm going to add to the confusion. I'm going to sign my name upside-down.'

"Most women find me too cutthroat."

"I'll be honest with you, I've been around the block a few times."

"Sorry I'm late: my parents insisted I wear protection on our first date, so I stopped to buy a flea-collar..."

Love Birds love just being together

"This could be the marriage all our other marriages were for!"

Today, proud and accomplished the career woman re-enters the dating world, ready at last to meet the man of her dreams. . .

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

"Outré or simply bad?"

"How else will I know when I'm clean as a hound's tooth?"

"Since my divorce I thought I'd never laugh again. Then I noticed your toupee."

'You're no Pollock.'

"A conundrum, rather than an outright mess, I think, Mrs Ellis..."

'This is the painting he was about to start when he shot himself.'

Banana Smoothie

You just keep giving.

Man looking at greeting cards labeled "Apologies for not writing sooner" with sub-headings for different lengths of time.

Jackson Pollock makes a mistake: 'Guess I'll have to start over.'

"Our first order of business will be the new speed bump in the parking lot."

"It's me, Lucky—you can drop the best-friend shtick."

Free love