Green Philosopher Gifts

Smoking world.

'You never knew your father - he's 10,000 pairs of chopsticks.'

Self-Sufficiency My Arse. He's workshy!

"How much energy did you use to create me? I wasn't awakened with nuclear power, was I?..."

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

"We finally reached net zero emissions."

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

'You have to Marvell eh - 'annihalating all that's made to a green thought in a green shade.''

"I do miss trees but I don't miss the raking."

Don't let the woodcutters get too close or they'll make a fuel out of you!

Water Gardening: One thing is certain - you will find the peace and tranquility of water an almost irresistible attraction.

"This works, so why do we need to spend all that energy building a nest?"

"Matthew, did we agree to adopt a whale?"

'It's a bold initiative but I don't think it's right for the staff kitchen.'

"Sorry, Rudolph, but the production on electric reindeers and their batteries gives work to thousands of children while you destroy the climate with your farts."

'Have you done something to your air? You look different?'

Fred deciding which sort of power to use to cut wood for his wood burning air conditioner.

'I'm afraid I'll fall and no one will hear me.'

Biro Diversity

A globe detaches itself from its stand and falls into a rubbish bin in the offices of the (fictional) Institute of Environmental Forecasting

Deer against capital punishment about to be shot.

Climate Change -- You are here.

'There's a renewable source the government should use.'

'We are an environmentally sensitive organization. We will have to do a background check on the size of your carbon footprint before we can make an offer of employment.'

'An aerosol? Are you sure you've thought this through?'

'She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me...'

The Ship of Fools. The earth as a ship, heading for destruction as people party, oblivious to the danger

'It's only now that we've chopped down all of the trees that we can see the damage we've done'

"At least their bull sessions are green. Everything they say is 100% biodegradable."

'Is it me, Fiona, or the hole in the ozone?'

'I can't sleep for thinking about global warming.'

Recycling bin for 'short term business plans'

Ecological Therapy

"Some day, son, all this will be yours. Sorry."