Green Gadget Fan Pillows

"It's nice, but not quite the electric car I was hoping for."

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

'MY husband made the coffee table out of an old door.'

'When played backwards these say terrible things like 'do your homework' and 'clean your room.''

Look! There's a photo of our eco club's Earth Day actions in the newspaper! Sports. Power up the green machine!! I could use more copies. Me too. They're going to really power up my college applications.

"Can't fix the WiFi? How times flies! Seems only yesterday you couldn't program the VCR!"

Smart Arse Meter

'He's not a 'bad' phone. He's just not a 'smart' phone.'

Man riding a bike frame with a cat and a dog attached to harnesses where the wheels would normally be

"Our carbon footprint has been very, very good to us."

With the Inflatable Pocket Potty, you'll never have to wait in line again at the stadium.

'Very impressive resume... new printer?'

"Thanks Dad. How much did you pay for this mp3 player?"

"Do I put google maps on driving or walking directions?"

"How do I turn Alexa off?"

"Err... Excuse me Sir, you've forgotten the user manual for your super mini mobile."

"Hey, you're cute, you must give me your number."

'Sorry, guys. I can't go out. I'm grounded.'

Artist paints nude model with Etch-a-Sketch.

'Now if everyone in Britain drove a car like that, we could save our planet!'

Remote Toaster

Happiness is iPadding a nature show in surround-smell.

'I'm not texting you because I'm your counterpart in low-tech universe.'

'I want you to know we're 100% sustainable now. We've phased out tarpits and switched to solar panels and double glazing!'

Something keeps shorting out my bug zapper. Maybe it's lightning bugs!

"Based on those growth rings maybe that branch was only 39 years old, but there's no way the rest of her is."

"Should anyone present think Dan’s tree-hugging has gone off the rails, speak now or forever hold your peace."

Technology and drought

Man in gas guzzler has a 'Go Green' registration.

Does it come with an anti virus package?

I'll trade you my phone for a latte. Pardon? You'll love it. It's vintage. A collector's item. It's from 1998. I bought it from a really old man in a magic shop last year. No deal. Come on! It's not like the shop vanished as soon as I left it. And it's not like I keep getting mysterious late-night calls on it from people in 1998 who keep telling me jokes I've already heard a million times. And it's not like the magic shop man told me I can only get rid of the phone by selling it or trading it. R

'I'm sorry my beeper went off during the part about redemption.'

"No school like the old school."

'Looks like a great job!'

"In the end, I chose not to wait to be phased out."